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Writer's pictureTurner Powers

How to Use a “Feel Wheel” for Emotional Growth: A Guide for You and Your Toddler



Managing emotions can be challenging at any age, but it’s especially vital to start early with tools that help us recognize and communicate our feelings. The “Feel Wheel” is one such tool that’s both simple and effective. Designed to visually categorize and expand on core emotions, a Feel Wheel makes it easier for anyone to identify exactly what they’re feeling and process it in a healthy way. This post will walk you through how to use a Feel Wheel for both yourself and your toddler, promoting emotional growth and resilience in your family.


What Is a Feel Wheel?

A Feel Wheel, also known as an emotion wheel, is a circular diagram that categorizes emotions into broader primary feelings and then narrows them down into more specific terms. Popularized by psychologist Dr. Robert Plutchik, the Feel Wheel divides emotions into core categories such as joy, fear, anger, surprise, sadness, and more. As emotions become more defined, the wheel helps individuals articulate their feelings with precision.



Why Use a Feel Wheel?

  • Increases Emotional Awareness: Helps individuals and children identify complex emotions.

  • Enhances Communication: Makes it easier to articulate how we feel, which is crucial for effective relationships.

  • Promotes Emotional Regulation: When we can label our emotions, it’s easier to manage them.

  • Builds Empathy and Understanding: When used together as a family, it fosters empathy and understanding between family members.


Using the Feel Wheel as an Adult


Step 1: Identify Core Emotions

Start by looking at the innermost part of the wheel to find the primary emotion that best matches what you’re feeling. For example, if you feel off but aren’t sure why, start with broad terms like “happy,” “sad,” “angry,” “afraid,” “surprised,” or “disgusted.” From here, narrow it down using the wheel’s outer layers.


Step 2: Pinpoint Specific Emotions

Let’s say you start with the core emotion “angry.” As you move outward on the wheel, “angry” might branch into more specific emotions like “frustrated,” “annoyed,” or “resentful.” This level of specificity is essential for processing complex emotions more effectively.


Step 3: Reflect on Triggers

Once you’ve identified the emotion, think about what might have triggered it. Reflection encourages self-awareness, which is key to managing reactions. Ask yourself:

  • Why do I feel this way?

  • Is there a pattern here?

  • What would help me feel better?


Step 4: Journal or Discuss

Writing in a journal or talking with a trusted friend or therapist can help you further process these feelings. Reflecting on emotions allows you to manage and learn from them.



Using the Feel Wheel with Toddlers


Why Teach Emotional Awareness Early? For toddlers, understanding and expressing emotions can be tricky since they’re just beginning to learn about the world. A Feel Wheel helps them label emotions, reducing tantrums and frustration.


Step 1: Start with Simple Terms

Toddlers may not understand words like “frustrated” or “overwhelmed” yet. Use the Feel Wheel to focus on the primary core emotions—happy, sad, mad, and scared. Simplify the language to make it more relatable for your toddler.


Step 2: Make It a Game

Introduce the Feel Wheel during playtime to make learning emotions enjoyable. Ask questions like:

  • “Can you show me what feeling ‘happy’ looks like?”

  • “When was the last time you felt ‘sad’?”

Making it interactive keeps toddlers engaged and helps them remember the emotions.


Step 3: Use Visual Cues

For toddlers, visual aids work wonders. Print out or draw a Feel Wheel with large, colorful images that represent each emotion. You can even use emojis or cartoon faces to help them relate emotions with expressions.


Step 4: Practice and Reinforce

After labeling their emotions, toddlers benefit from guidance on how to manage them. If they say they feel “mad,” ask what might help them feel better. You can even role-play scenarios, such as calming down with deep breaths or counting.


Incorporating the Feel Wheel Into Your Routine


1. Morning Check-Ins: During breakfast or before the day starts, check in with yourself and your toddler. Ask them how they feel and have them point to the Feel Wheel to describe their mood. Doing this regularly makes them more comfortable expressing emotions.

2. Bedtime Reflection: Use the Feel Wheel at night to reflect on the day. This is a great opportunity to teach children about gratitude and self-awareness, promoting better sleep and a peaceful routine.

3. Responding to Tantrums or Frustration: When toddlers are upset, encourage them to point to the Feel Wheel. You might say, “I see you’re feeling upset. Let’s look at the Feel Wheel together to see how you’re feeling.” This teaches them to associate emotions with vocabulary and eventually promotes emotional control.



Long-Term Benefits of Using a Feel Wheel Together


1. Emotional Resilience: Naming and understanding emotions are fundamental skills for emotional resilience. 2. Improved Relationships: Communication improves when emotions are expressed accurately, fostering healthier family dynamics. 3. Stress Reduction: When toddlers and adults can accurately identify and address their emotions, stress and frustration are minimized. 4. Lifelong Skills: As children grow, they’ll carry these emotional tools with them, which can enhance their mental well-being throughout life.


FAQs


How often should I use the Feel Wheel with my toddler? Try to incorporate it daily, even for just a few minutes. Consistent use helps solidify their emotional vocabulary.

What if my toddler has trouble using it? Be patient and model the behavior yourself. Point to the wheel when you’re feeling certain emotions, saying, “Mommy feels happy” or “Daddy feels tired.” Children learn by example.

Can adults use the Feel Wheel too? Absolutely! In fact, modeling the use of a Feel Wheel can help normalize emotional awareness in the household.



Start the Feel Wheel Journey Together


Using a Feel Wheel for you and your toddler fosters a shared understanding of emotions, teaching children early on that all feelings are normal and manageable. Whether you’re checking in during the morning, reflecting at bedtime, or soothing a tantrum, this tool is versatile, empowering, and a wonderful foundation for building emotional resilience as a family.

Incorporate the Feel Wheel into your routine, and watch as emotional awareness, communication, and compassion flourish in your family.

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